- Jul 14, 2020
Communication: Relating in Relationships
Do you feel lonely despite being in a relationship? Do you feel ignored by your partner? Do you feel the need to be in touch or surrounded by your partner 24/7? Or do you feel like sometimes you are just not on the same page whatsoever?
If your answer was yes to more than one of your questions, you and your partner might be having issues with relating to one another.
Everyone’s definition of a “good relationship” differs. It is subjective. However, objectively, there are certain things you need in a romantic relationship to remain happy. There are different ways to relate to each other in relationships.
- Communication is the key. It is healthy to have misunderstandings and disagreements every now and then. If you are unable to communicate your needs, just because you are always trying to avoid conflict in the relationship, you may be bottling your feelings. It may seem like a good idea initially, but it definitely is not in the long run. Those feelings are bound to explode once the build-up becomes unbearable. So let’s not let it get to that. Communicate with your partner! Let them know what is important to you and what you need from a relationship. Be vocal about it, but in a healthy way.
- Set your boundaries from the beginning to avoid feelings of resentment towards your partner later. Mutually agree upon them. Empathize with one another.
- Connecting is extremely important – not only on a physical level but on an emotional level, too, in your day-to-day life. It can be done by doing things together, finding hobbies together, and validating each other every now and then, through your partner’s desired love language.
- Try not to have expectations, but to hold healthy boundaries.
Changes in Relationship Dynamics With Social Media
With the age of information and technology, relating to each other in relationships has become more complex than ever. It comes with a higher set of challenges. You can match with someone on a dating application, relate to them via text, but then discover that this is not the case in person or vice versa. Is being a bad texter a deal-breaker for you? Is that an essential way of communication for you? Is that how you relate to your partner?
Simultaneously, long-distance relationships have become more common than ever due to this world without borders via social media. It is way easier to keep in touch now via text, calls, or even video calls. The problems long-distance relationships often experience are time difference and the lack of effort from one side eventually. The success of long-distance relationships requires a collective effort from both sides. Long-distance relationships can have a higher success of a deeper connection as couples are spending more time talking and connecting on deeper levels.
So, What Is a Love Language?
It is the language you speak, and want others to speak to make you feel loved. It is the way you want others to show you they love you or how you express your love to others. Through love languages, you can ascertain the conflict, and grow closer to each other. It is a way of being able to empathize and relate to one another and can be shortlisted into five different love languages:
Words of Affirmation
“I love being around you because you’re so funny.”
“Your hair and outfit look amazing.”
“You got this! I know you’ll be super successful in what you’re trying to achieve in life.”
“I love you.”
Anything ranging from basic compliments to just showing your gratitude and love for your partner can have a tremendous impact on them if words of affirmation is their love language. It is also why the slightest negative remark could affect your partner more than you could imagine. Have you heard that saying “sticks and stones can break my bones, but words will also hurt me”? Yes, that applies here, more than you know.
Acts of Service
Do small gestures mean a lot to you – like your partner doing tasks for you voluntarily? Like doing your laundry for you or picking up your clothes from the dry cleaners when you are busy. Your partner has no responsibility or obligation to do this, but they do it out of love. If this is something that means a lot to you, this may be your love language.
It includes any meaningful gifts for your partner. It does not necessarily have to be expensive; it can be anything, from a box of chocolates to a cute piece of jewelry to anything. Leave it up to your imagination.
Do you want your partner’s undivided attention every time you are with them? Does it bother you when they pick up their phone when you are with them? Do you feel hurt when they cancel a plan with you?
Does all of this make you feel like you are not being prioritized? If the answer was yes to more than one of these questions, quality time might be your love language.
Does your partner feel more loved with physical intimacy? Do you feel that they do not feel loved without a little public display of affection from time to time?
If so, your partner may not feel loved without your physical touch.
You may need to understand your partner’s love language to make them feel loved and validated. It is how you can learn to love again.
How Can You Ask for Help With Your Relationship?
If despite trying all these methods to ignite the spark in your relationship, you feel like your relationship is going downhill, we are here to help you work through it with your partner. There are different types of therapies available. Pick them based on what you are looking for.
Psychotherapy for Couples
Yes, communication is the key to success for any relationship in life. But what do you do when communicating with each other is just not working out? Does it seem too complicated? Do you and your partner argue every time you even try to communicate?
If yes, you may need a neutral middle person to sit down with you and your partner, and work through these issues. Sustaining a relationship requires dedication and hard work. Working with a professional therapist or counselor with MindShift Psychological Services may be the solution here. Couples counseling or marriage counseling can help you and your partner heal via open communication.
Are you and your spouse having a stressful time? Do you feel like it is putting a strain on your family life by dragging your children into the mix? Are you and your spouse having too many disagreements about family roles and responsibilities? If yes, there are a number of different therapies available at MindShift Psychological Services that can be helpful for you.
How is MindShift different?
At MindShift Psychological Services, we are not only revolutionizing the way therapists provide therapy but we are also seeking to reduce the stigma of receiving counseling and make therapy more accessible and affordable. Moreover, we use a blend of therapeutic styles and approaches tailored to your personal or group needs. With MindShift Psychological Services, you are assured of receiving expert help by licensed and certified psychotherapists with the highest level of training in our field.