If there is one thing in the world that all parents are scared of – it is losing their children. Dealing with the death of your child is like reaping your heart out with bare hands – cruel and excruciating. Living each day becomes unbearable and maddening.
You may think that losing your child is the end of you. You feel that the whole world is conspiring against you to be punished and to suffer. While having this perception is perfectly normal, you have to know that you need to move forward and be well.
How to take care of yourself after the death of your child?
One hard truth about life is you need to look after yourself no matter how difficult the situation is. You can rely on your family and friends but you are the only person who can decide to make things okay and better.
1. Be with your family.
You are not the only one who is grieving. The feeling of loss and emptiness extends to other family members. They, too, feel the emotions that surround you, especially your spouse and your other children. It will do you good if you all talk as a family about the situation.
Right now, they are the people who truly understand what you have been through. Be around them and take turns in sharing what you are feeling inside and how this may change your life forever. Bottling up your feelings will do more harm than good to you.
2. Nourish your body.
It is normal to isolate and withdraw yourself from reality. It is understandable why you lost the desire to do anything that will be a reminder of your happy moments with him/ her. But this does not mean that you need to take your health and wellness for granted.
You know that at some point you need to face the truth and slowly cope with the death of your child. Force yourself to eat, to exercise or to sleep just enough to give sustenance to your body. This is not the time to get sick because your spouse and your children need you.
3. Allow yourself to grieve.
Everyone grieves differently and it does not make you a bad person if you cannot easily move on. As a parent, the intensity of the loss is far heavier than anyone. The whirlwind of emotions becomes too much and sometimes, you just do not know where to begin the healing process.
Give yourself time to understand the situation. Eventually, it will give you the answers and clarity on why you have to experience this. But if not, do not let yourself be consumed with grief and loneliness that you will miss the wonderful things life has to offer.
4. Talk about your pain.
Most times, the dreading part of dealing with the loss of your child is people wanting you to talk about it. It may come off as rude or insensitive to some but others find comfort and solace. Talking about this traumatic experience and the grief helps you in the healing process.
They say that the more you open up and discuss your feelings, the easier for you to see certain aspects that will help you heal. Yes, it is hard for you to talk about the pain, but it is one of the helpful ways to cope with the death of your child.
5. Be kind to yourself.
Parents often blame themselves for the death of their child. They regret not doing more or for not exhausting themselves in preventing this tragedy. But as a parent, you know in your heart that you will never do anything that will hurt your child.
Do not waste your energy and time rewinding the events because it is beyond your control. Instead, focus on your healing as well as your family. This experience gives you so much pain but you need to stop yourself from drowning in the sea of regrets and what-ifs.
6. Accept help.
All the people around you want to make your life bearable in this tragic time. They only want to make things easier for you as you face the harsh reality. Accept their help and be grateful for these wonderful people.
If they offer to take your other kids to school, be thankful. If your neighbors prepare food for your family, respond with a smile and gratitude. If they call to ask how you are doing, do not shut them down.
7. Seek counseling.
One of the most effective ways to cope with the death of your child is to attend therapy near me or counseling sessions. Talking about your situation with medical professionals gives you a better understanding. It eases your body and mind from wallowing into extreme isolation and loneliness.
Mindshift Psychological Services creates a relaxing and comforting place for parents, like you, who have to deal with premature loss. Their licensed and exceptional medical professionals make sure that you will learn to accept and heal from this painful experience.
Some of their highly praised services include Trauma therapy near me, Depression Therapy, Psychotherapy for Individuals and Couples. In order to know more about their services, you may visit their website and book an appointment.
